Tuesday, February 19, 2013

The ABCs of Death (2013)



The ABCs of Death is a anthology film with 26 directors, doing a short about death, which represents their letter.  When I heard the concept, it did catch my interest.  The thing was I didn't know how they would pull it off in 90 + minutes.  To the creator's credit, they pulled it off.  Some of the shorts were done very well.  Others were okay.  Then you had your silly/stupid ones and some funny ones.

Here are the titles of the shorts and what I thought of them:

A is for Apocalypse- This one got things rollings.  A wife is trying to kill her husband, but the husband wouldn't die.  She tries everything but nothing works.  Turns out that the World is coming to an end and she wanted the husband to die a peacefu,l instead of suffering the wrath of the apocalypse.

B is for Bigfoot-  It was alright but still enjoyable.  A  guy is trying to make love to his lady, but is interrupted by his little cousin.  They tell a story about the abominable snowman and how he kills little children who don't go to sleep.  Turns out that children aren't the ones that the snowman  kills.

C is for Cycle- Crazy little short.  You see a puddle of blood and a guy starring at it, wondering where it came from.  The next day he finds portal in his backyard and enters it.  He wakes up and finds himself lying in the ground.  He goes inside and finds his wife in bed with another man, who turns out to be himself.  The end was done very well and I enjoyed this short.

D is for Dogfight- I loved this short.  It takes place at a underground fight club.  A middle-aged man brawls with a dog in a very intense fight.  This is one of my favorites.  Just loved how well it was shot.  It almost had a Chris Cunningham feel.  And I loved the twist in the end.

E is for Exterminate-  This one is directing by the lovely Angela Bettis (May, The Woman).  After seeing this one, I now sleep with the blanket over me to make sure I don't get bitten by a spider.  E is for Exterminate is about a guy who tries to kill a spider, but fails.  The spider stalks the guy and bites his face when he was asleep.  The ending was really crazy and to me, it's a horrible way to go out.

F is for Fart- One of the most bizarre short from this anthology.  This only shows that the Japanese really come up with some crazy shit.  A school girl who enjoys farts, tries to survive after a big earthquake unleashes a terrible gas.  Instead of "going out" by the earthquake's gas, she decides to die from smelling her teacher's farts.  I was not aware that you can suck your farts back in you arse.

G is for Gravity-  I thought this one was the weakest entry.  It's shot POV style.  A guy goes surfing and then drowns because the Earth's gravity pulls him under the water.

H is for Hydro-Electric Diffusion- Being a fan of Looney-Tunes, I enjoyed this one.  It takes place in Britain during WWII.  A bulldog who is a fighter pilot goes inside a burlesque club.  There, a fox puts on a sexy show for the bulldog, but turns out that she's a Nazi spy.  The Nazi fox tries to kill the bulldog and the bulldog tries to survive.  Have to admit, that fox was really hot.

I is for Ingrown- This one had a dark feel to it.  You see a man holding a syringe and a oil carton.  He then walks up to the bath tub and we see a woman tied to the tub.  The man injects her with the syringe and takes off.  The woman feels a reaction to the syringe and scratches her skin off and dies.

J is for Jidai-geki (Samurai films)- This one was really funny.  Pretty much it's about a guy performing Harakiri.  Whilee doing the suicide ritual, he starts laughing and making funny and bizarre faces.  The executioner tries really hard not to laugh and builds up a sweat.  Very well done.

K is for Klutz- One of the two animated shorts in this flick.  This was shot in 2D animation.  After using the bathroom, a blonde lady is struggling to flush down her poop, who doesn't want to go away.  It was pretty funny and the kill was brutal.

L is for Libido-  Probably the most dark and perverted one in this film.  A guy finds himself tied to a chair next to another man.  There are people surrounded, wearing a mask.  A naked woman comes out and the guys start masturbating.  It turns out that this is some sick perverted game.  The first guy to ejaculate first, gets to survive.  While the loser gets a spike up his arse.  Towards the end, it gets really crazy and disturbing.  But I have to say that it was well made.

M is for Miscarriage- This was directed by Ti West.  I've read that this was lazy by a few people.  It wasn't as disturbing as the last short, but it tries.  You see a woman looking down the toilet and then goes upstairs to grab a plunger.  When she comes back, we then see a mutilated fetus.  This one was really short and I wonder what if Ti had a little more time.

N is for Nuptials- Ha ha ha!  Hilarious.  This is why it's best not to have a parrot as a pet.  Guy buys a parrot  to show a trick to his girlfriend.  The girlfriend isn't impress until the boyfriend proposes using the parrot.  Everything turns out great until the parrot repeats a incident where the boyfriend was fooling around with another woman, which upset the girlfriend.

O is for Orgasm-  This was very artsy.  A woman is getting oral by her man.  There's a lot of random stuff going on.  A leather strap is wrapped around the woman's throat.  And when she gets her orgasm, she dies of suffocation.  This reminded me of A Realm of the Senses with the whole choking.

P is for Pressure- I found this sad and disturbing because I know this is true.  A mother of three wants to buy her daughters a bike.  She tries to earn the money by prostituting.  While in a night club, a man approaches her with a proposition, but the woman refuses, but the man gives her his business card.  While she was out, her boyfriend steals her money and takes off.  Out of desperation, the woman takes up the offer from the man at the night club.  Turns out that the man makes fetish videos that involves house pets.

Q is for Quack- Eh, it was alright.  The director and producer are struggling to figure out what to shot for their "Letter Q" segment.  After many thoughts, they decided to kill a live duck on film.  Unfortunately, it didn't go well and they ended up killing each other.

R is for Removed-  This was from the director of "A Serbian Film".  A very weird short, indeed.  A man is getting his skin removed by a surgeon.  In his skin there are film strips.  The man wasn't gonna take it anymore, so he escapes from the hospital and takes some bodies down.

S is for Speed-   "Faster Pussycat, Kill Kill" came to mind.  A woman is trying to run away from Death.  She tries everything, but to no avail.  Finally Death catches her and she accepts her fate. The ending reminds me of Karim Hussain's segment in "The Theater Bizarre".  But still a good segment.

T is for Toilet- This is the second animated feature on the flick.  Now this one is done in stop-motion claymation.  A mother and father are trying to get their son to use the toilet, who is scared to use it.  The toilet comes to life and kills the family.  Turns out that it was all a dream and the son uses the toilet.  Sadly, the toilet turns out to be the death of him.

U is for Unearthed- Another POV segment.  But This one was way better than the "G" segment.  We look through the eyes of a vampire, as he is getting attacked by the villagers.  He tries to escape, but is finally caught.  This was directed by Ben Wheatley (Kill List).  Very well shot.

V is for Vagitus- I wouldn't be surprise if this segment was the most expensive from the other shorts.  This took place in the future where everyone is infertile.  A police woman and her giant robot take down a group with telekinetic powers.  They find a baby and try to take it away.  The robot bites the baby's head off and kills the parents.  When the police woman finds out what her superiors are planning to do, she attempts to put a stop to it.  The baby has some life left and takes out the chief.

W is for WTF-  The segment starts off with adult swim type of cartoon.  We then see director Jon Schnepp trying to finish part.  He has other ideas for the letter W segment, but things get really fuck'n weird.  I giant walrus.  Planes  release some strange smoke in the sky.  Zombie clowns and a bunch of shenanigan.  This has a lot of WTF moments.

X is for XXL- Xavier Gens' segment was pretty brutal.  A obese woman is being harassed because she is over-weight.  She no longer can't bare being fat, so she takes it upon herself to get rid of it.  Instead of exercising and going on a diet, she uses a knife to cut the fat.  In the end, she's thin, but skinless.

Z is for Zetsumetsu- The last segment and a it's really bizarre one, indeed.  This had sex, blood, and politics.  I have no idea what is going on.  There are some reference to Hiroshima, 9-11, and the Tokyo earthquake.  There is also a chick with a big dick, that has a sword coming out of it's pee hole.

So in conclusion, The ABCs of Death was enjoyable.  I was able see all the way through.  There was some good ones, bad ones, and funny ones.  Some might enjoy it.  Others will find it stupid.  If you can rent it, I highly recommend that. 

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